Que lastima, Sarah Palin! Is this the end for the heroic Alaskan everywoman, who came out of nowhere to bravely humiliate herself on the national stage in one brief flash of incomprehensible fuck-upitude? No, liberals, no. And why don't you all stop lying: you crave more Sarah Palin. She is the political equivalent of hate sex. But it's obvious now that Palin's future isn't in politics; it's in the media! She can barely speak English, but fellas sure do like to hear her anyhow. With that in mind, we present free of charge, in the spirit of unity the simple five-step plan for Sarah Palin'...

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